Browsing through message board comments, I never ceased to be amazed at people telling stories about being “embarrassed” or “fearful” of someone spotting the fact that they are wearing height increasing shoes—particularly worrying about situations in which they’ll have to remove their shoes.
Somehow, in all of the comments being exchanged by users—most of which have never actually had any experience with height increasing shoes—very few people seem to point out the obvious; that virtually everything in life is only awkward when you make it awkward.
Imagine, for example, “discovering” that a woman used a beauty filter in her dating profile picture.
It’s not hard to imagine a casual, throwaway response. “Of course! A woman’s got to look her best.” “Of course, it’s 2019, it’s part of the game.” Or any number of a dozen other responses. And then…the conversation just moves on.
Now, imagine if the same woman responded to the observation about her using filters by going on a long discussion about how she has to use a filter, because of how ashamed she is about her acne, and how ugly she feels about the lines in her face, or her bone structure, and how uncomfortable people seeing her without makeup makes her feel…
Suddenly, the conversation is really heavy, really awkward, and has probably derailed the tone of whatever else the two of you were previously discussing.
Literally the only difference in either case was how the person handled the situation; did they feel the need to justify it, and explain it, and feel self-conscious about it…or did they just own their choices unapologetically?
When it comes to elevator shoes, especially as it relates to the reaction of a existing or potential significant other, or feedback from friends or family in situations where you have to remove your shoes…just own it!
Don’t feel the need to explain it away—just be as casual and unmoved as the woman laughing off a critique of her using a filter in her photos.
And more than just having a “good response” - genuinely internalize it. I don’t feel “self conscious” about myself at all (and that’s the simple truth), I just happen to find that I get more opportunities to introduce myself without getting “pre-disqualified” when I’m taller than a woman than when I’m less so, or that the vibe of certain corporate interactions can be effected by height differences between myself and others in the environment.
At the end of the day, it’s literally just a tool that I have a personal preference for, like a woman enjoying the feeling she gets wearing a push-up bra or her favorite pair of lipstick. I don’t spend any mental energy feeling inadequate or self conscious for needing it—I just use it and enjoy the results.
That difference in perspective, though, means that I don’t bat an eyelash when a friend or long time colleague “discovers” that I’m wearing them. After all, I’m not wearing them to “hide” who am I, any more than a woman wearing makeup wears it to “hide” who she is.
By all means, that’s not to say that you’d be wrong to wear your height increasing shoes with pant legs that help to conceal the lift, any more than a woman exaggerating her cup size with padding should have the padding visibly sticking out of her top. But it also means that you shouldn’t let it define you, or feel any drop in self confidence when you’re without them.
It’s purely a tool to offset shallowness and uninformed perspectives from others, in situations when you decide that those initial impressions are relevant to you and your interests.
So the next time you strap on a pair of elevator shoes, stand tall; rock them, own it, and be proud of the fact that you unapologetically chose to define exactly how you allow other people to view you.
